Re: Diary of chanting aspirant

Nityananda, Gauranga, Hare Krishna.
Jaya Guru Parampara, Jaya Swamiji Gaurangapada!
Dandavats to all the Vaishnanvas.

Dear Bhakta Igor,

Chanting and praying is very essential indeed if one wants to find God. As you, I too am not born into this Vedic tradition and have different views on the teachings of the Guru Parampara. But here's a story from the desert fathers which I hope will inspire you. Once there was a monk who went to see his Father Abbot and told him: �Dear Father, I find I�m not at all fit to live in the monastery. I sin all the time and I can�t do all the prayers and monastic duties. I must confess that I�m not a good brother after all and must ask you, Father Abbot, to leave this house immediately.� The Father Abbot looked at him, smiled and said: �We fall and stand up. We fall and stand up. We fall and stand up again�� The brother looked at the Abbot, understood his profound message and remained in the monastery.

For those people not living in a monastery, who are married and have job, things are much, much harder. Getting to a level of chanting 100.000 Names per day is not at all an easy task. A day only has 24 hours. Count 8 hours per day of work (plus an extra hour or two on the road just to there and home again). Chanting a pure 100.000 Names takes well over 8 hours. And humans do need their sleep. So if you�re married and are a householder, when do you have the time to do the necessary chores and spend some time with the family? When do you even have the time to catch up reading the Acarya�s books? And contemplate on their teachings? And pray to God? I don�t live in a monastery, so I try to work out a good balance between all these matters and know that as long as I need to go to work (to maintain my family), I won�t make it to chant 100.000 Names per day. God knows about my intentions and He will decide upon my sincerity and my actions. He knows I�m desperately seeking Him and that my life is in His Hands.

Humbly aspiring to be a true yet simple devotee of our Lord,
Damodara Svarupa dasa

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