Re: Tears in Navadvipa

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Re: Tears in Navadvipa

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Re: Diary of chanting aspirant

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Re: Diary of chanting aspirant

Nityananda Gauranga Hare Krsna

Today I was reading Swami's realizations about  chanting in dham - Tears in Navadvipa and I started to think - yes, this is what I want, this is life that I want, life of devotion. How to attain this service, how to attain devotion?Answer is - Naam.

Then I realised that I should chant Naam because that will please my Gurudeva and Krsna. If I can force/manage/subdue myself to dedicate to Naam more and more, somehow or other in future gradually try to attain level of 64/64/64 rounds per day that will please Gurudeva most.

Frankly, I do not see any other possible way what I should do. I am born in non-vedic family, purity, pancaratrika-vidhi, sanskrit, philosophy, jnjana, vedic rituals - it is all not familiar to me, nor that I have any attraction to this. My goal is simple - chanting Naam and I am hoping that will please my Gurudeva.

Very often I am complicated, but I know that is byproduct of this western heritage, we have this tendency to complicate things. But in fact, this is simple, just chant Naam, really surrender to Naam and all perfection will be there.

I know that I am learning, slowly, mostly on mistakes. Very often I am founding myself that I am completely incapable to understand or practice devotional activities fully, but then I have picture of Swami Gaurangapada and some strenght to continue is automatically there - Yes, I want to be like this person, like my guru, I want also to chant and understand what is bhakti, to do something positive with this life.

To reach goal of chanting 100.000  Names daily is gigantic task for person like me.  Mountains of false ego,  crazy mind, and not evan one good quality.  Only some sradha that I will  get some unconditional mercy  from Gurudeva.  I am only making problems to Him, bothering and asking some irrelevant questions, pretending to be devotee, speak some non-sence. I am not have determination or strength. But, anyway I have small faith that if I somehow or other manage always to stay around him, I will become purified and gradually, someday I may chant nicely. It is possible to transform iron into gold. Association of pure devotee is the key.

So, today I decided to write this short entry into diary of chanting aspirant. That is right definition. Aspirant. Student. Beginner. This whole process is based on mercy. Guru-krsna prasade paya bhakti lata bija. Guru-krpa...mercy of guru is everything. I do not know how to get, earn, steal this mercy, I am making many mistakes but still have faith that simply by trying, somehow or other I will get drop of mercy from my Gurudeva. then, and only if he give me his mercy, I will be able to chant someday 100.000. Names daily in complete absorption in Naam, Form, Pastimes etc. That is goal of life, everything else is secondary.

While reading Tears in Navadvipa, such thoughts came to me today.

ekaki amara, nahi paya bala,
hari-nama-sankirtane
tumi kṛpa kori', sraddha-bindu diya,
deho' krsna-nama-dhane

 "I do not find the strength to carry on alone the sankirtana of the holy name of Hari. Please bless me by giving me just one drop of faith with which to obtain the great treasure of the holy name of Krsna."

 

 

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Re: Naam-shiksha and Naam-diksha

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Re: The Life of Naama Bhajana

Swami wrote:
"I feel a little embarrassed to deeply describe my Naama Bhajana realizations even by writing. But I have noticed that it inspires many devotees in their chanting of Naama."

Nityananda Gauranga Hare Krsna
Dear Gurudeva, I know that you hesitate or feeling embarrassed by describing your personal bhajan, but you can see that many devotees are finding inspiration in reading or hearing them. So please, do not hesitate to share with us such realizations, because they will give us more sradha and strength to chant  seriously and attain pure stage of chanting.

Actually, your pure chanting and faith in Naam is what pushing me to continue despite my imperfections and numerous shortcomings. Naam is all-powerful, but when pure devotee like yourself is chanting Naam, evan mlechas and rascals like myself may benefit and I am 1008% sure that if we simply continue to listen your words and Naam some day we will also attain attraction toward chanting. Your realisations and example of ecstatic, steady chanting is best guidance and  ultimate goal for all of us. Your example is what is still giving me hope that someday this fool will become serious and sincire in devotion.

sakale sammana korite sakati,
deho' natha! jathajatha
tabe to' gaibo, hari-nama-sukhe,
aparadha ha 'be hata

"I offer you all respects, for thus I may have the energy to know you correctly. Then, by chanting the holy name in great ecstasy, all my offenses will cease."

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Re: Naam-shiksha and Naam-diksha

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Re: Naam-shiksha and Naam-diksha

Nityananda! Gauranga! Hare Krishna!

Thank You very much. i have another question in this connection:

What about ordinary devotees giving Naam-shiksha? i think we are supposed to instruct and encourage others about chanting the the Holy Names of the Lord, especially the Most Merciful Holy Names of Nityananda Gauranga. According to my view, that includes a certain Naam-shiksha. Is it not an offense to one's Gurudeva if one does so without His explicit permission? 

i will share honestly one experience with all of You just for Your benefit that You may learn something from my case, whether if i did right or wrong...

i have a friend who is quite bhakti inclined and appreciative of Nityananda Gauranga Naam and Avataara. One day i felt and inspiration to introduce him to chanting Nityananda Gauranga Naam on the japa. So i gave him my old japa and told Him about Nityananda Gauranga Naam Mantras and how to chant them on beads. Then we chanted together some rounds (i did the same with other friend as well). During the whole "procedure", i was quite detached and felt also that my intention was pure and that anyway Lords Nitaai Gaura will take care and possibly forgive. i was quite cautious not the feel like Guru, or something similar. i tried to do it on behalf our Guru-Varga. But still i was feeling kind of responsibility for that soul, while doing that... Do i have a responsibility now for that soul?

Please Vaishnavas and Shrila Gaurangapada Gurudeva, tell me how do You see my case. Does anyone have similar experience? What are possible dangers during such acts?

Thank You very much.

Apparadhi Matus

 

 

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