Re: Divine mercy overlooks all limitations -- all is never lost

Dear Swamiji, Hadai prabhu and all Vaisnavas,

        Nityananda Gauranga Hare Krishna! Please accept my dandavat obeisances and my plea for your forgiveness!

        Why should one keep hope that one's devotional service never goes in vain? Because the devotee's vision is transcendental. The devotee sees beyond all that and sees the souls for what they really are -- devotees of the Lord who belong to the spiritual world. That is why a devotee can overlook all the limitations, again and again, because he is eternally on the spiritual platform and he always sees the soul beyond all those coverings. And that vision is exactly what keeps giving us infinite chances to get up and climb the ladder of bhakti again and yet again. Otherwise what would be our fate? In order to be saved from eternal bewilderment the only way is for the devotees to show their mercy, and this mercy overlooks all material considerations. At a higher level, the pious soul in heaven is equally in maya as the sinful soul in hell and there are really no differences between the souls. Why is it that Jagai and Madhai get Love of Godhead when others who were 'more qualified' in material terms like the mundane scholars and sannyasis don't? The answer is that the material qualification has got no meaning. All that mattered was that they surrendered to Lord Nityananda, whose benovelence is unfathomable and that was that.

         So all souls are fallen. There's no point in discrimination that one is pious and the other is sinful as both are bewildered. As a matter of fact, one who sees like that is still not on the highest plane. The dualist sees one soul as pious and another as sinful, one soul as a devotee and another as not a devotee. But in reality there are so many material designations, raising the number from 2 to anywhere we can imagine. An 'infinitist' conception makes so many designations, bird, animal, reptile, plant, deva, asura, mother, father, children, etc... A devotee may say non-devotees, but it means only that the souls devotional nature is not visible yet. The devotee has no material distinctions in reality. A Vaisnava blessing his servant and chastising an offender are both different forms of mercy as Vrindavana Dasa Thakura has clearly pointed out in the Chaitanya Bhagavata.

        And all souls are actually devotees, eternal devotees of the Lord. Eternal meaning their real nature is that and it exists eternally even though it is not manifest. So the differences vanish when we start seeing other souls as devotees and stop seeing them as their body or mind or false ego. Then real unconditional love and mercy can flow freely as it is not interrupted by any type of bias. I put my problem over to Hadai prabhu and ask him, "Am I unfit to be forgiven?" He says, "I forgive you always. I will always try to save you. I love you always and if you were to kill me for trying to deliver you, I will still continue to love you eternally and I will still be doing all I can to pull you up." What words! It is enough to cause a heart stopper and melt the heart of even the most stone hearted.  Will any material soul say that? Can they forgive us in the first place? Can they guarantee that they will help us beyond physical association? I in my life would rather go to hell for eternity or become a Mayavadi rather than hurt a devotee, but still.....I am speechless. Let me state here that even if a Vaisnava tells an offender, "Get out and don't show your face again!", still this is also done in that same mood as above and is the best thing that can be done to that soul. I with my limited vision do not have faculty to understand it, but it’s a fact.

         Coming to my problem, the pure devotee goes on, "Forget about their cursing. Those curses are only for the dead body, the mind and the false ego. There is no such thing called trouble on the spiritual level. there is no such a thing as trouble on the spiritual level. You are like Arjuna on the battlefield. You have to fight and kill the bodily concept because it is dead to begin with. Their curses may come true on the relative level, but for a devotee material effects are non-existent. You have to build spiritual strength to stay undisturbed in the ups and downs. Because do you feel happy when people praise you?" At once it strikes me, "Yes, actually I am influenced by their praise too." He replies, "That is not good either, both are binding. Be the witness to all these things. You are a devotee, eternal servant of the Lord and the Vaisnavas. You are actually only a witness and you must stay in that position. You are not the object of their praise or anger."

         I ask him the doubt that is strangling me, "Is the Lord angry with me?" The answer comes like a flood, "The Lord is not angry. He awaits your service. He doesn't magnify your flaws. He forgives. He loves you as nobody can love you ever and He holds you in better and worse times. The Lord's only there waiting to receive you, never to reject you. So do not dwell on these fluctuations, but keep running at all times to the Lord. Don't look back, just look forward. When you chant His Name, make it very relishable for Him. Put love in your voice. Call for the Lord in a loving way so He feels your love. On the material level you can become a complete failure and sometimes the Lord does that directly to us just to draw us in even closer to Him. When you choose for the Lord everything is possible. But we are not afraid for whatever that might be because He is always with us. He makes us surrender and takes everything away that is in the way and that is His mercy. But when we fall in the bodily concept, it seems unfair, but when we are on track again we feel so much closer to the Lord and we thank Him. This is spiritual life Srinath. He sends His devotees to pull you out. You can always rely on His devotees. Your sufferings are only transcendental 'love bites'. He needs just one drop of love, and that he makes into an ocean and gives it back and when you give it back to Him he makes it a trillion oceans, and then before you know it, you are drowned in the infiite ocean of spiritual love!"

         Speechless and almost crying in amazement and joy for a while, I then ask him what happens if suppose I did something that caused a pure devotee to send me away. Answer, "It depends on the student when the student gives up religious life altogether because of his guru rejecting him he falls down but when he faithfully keeps on serving his guru from a distance he is fine so it is a tremendous test when it happens mostly the student falls down because he feels severed from the parampara but he doesn't have to fall down and come even closer to the Lord when he withstands the test in time he might frind another guru or not depending on the Lords mercy. It also depaend on why the guru rejects him." However my understanding is that every act of a Vaisnava is merciful and if the soul becomes repentant and still endeavours to stay sincere to the devotees and the parampara, he will be forgiven soon. Mukunda was forgiven. Chota Haridas had to give up his body, but attained the spiritual world immeditately. If the soul isn't so sincere, he may face bad days for a long time, but someday the Vaisnava tattva will again forgive him. It may be another devotee the next time, so I refer to the Vaisnava tattva that manifests as various devotees and which includes all devotees in toto. That tattva makes all Vaisnavas non-different in principle. The activities of the devotees are a manifestation of the Vaisnava tattva, therefore whichever devotee delivers and forgives us, its always the same Vaisnava tattva at work, forgiving and delivering. This is why Vrindavana Dasa has advised never to think one Vaisnava as superior and another inferior, their potency and tattva is the same. In knowing this, I also see more of the acintya-bhedabheda tattva everywhere. The Vaisnava tattva will always be giving chances and if I have been foolish enough to drop the previous chances given to me, atleast let me stop this and take this chance. I must increase my determination. Even if I fail a million times, even if I make a million mistakes, I should not give up and I must go on with renewed vigour and serve the devotees. If we give up, we will continue to remain in that fallen condition. The fallen condition goes only by the process of devotional service, and if we stumble in our practice, then the only way to get up and keep going is to carry on the practice with double determination. The warrior never gives up and that determination is the most powerful and exponential accelerator of our spiritual progress. Enthusiasm is the first most favourable quality of a sadhaka according to The Nectar of Instruction, which is written by Rupa Gosvami, the topmost acarya Himself.
 
          In the end, if we become slack at our end the Lord who eagerly wants us back starts pulling his end of the rope harder and we feel that as a suffering feeling, but if we recognise that and pull on our side too, its not suffering anymore. The devotees forgive as they don't want any living entity to be denied the chance to reach the Lord. They want the universe emptied and the spiritual world full and if in the process they end up being the last one to leave the material world for Goloka, then they get the topmost bliss in being that last one. For this these Vaisnavas are dearer to Lord Gauranga Krishna than His very life and self, who can even understand how much bliss and love the Lord feels on seeing their devotion to serve His desire to liberate the living entities. The Lord Himself in the Gita declares that no one is more dearer to Him than such a devotee who spreads His word all over the creation. Those who preach the chanting of Nitai Gaura along with Hare Krishna are especially dear as they have thrown all confidentiality overboard in order to preach the best process by which the living entities can reach the Supreme Lord Gauranga Krishna, chanting Nityananda! Gauranga! and Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare | Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare! I fall at the feet of all these devotees, all the Vaisnavas and pray that I be forgiven for all my offenses to you, for not having realised your exalted position, for having even thought of estimating or trying to measure your greatness. Jaya Vaisnava Thakura! Jaya Guru Parampara! All glories to the devotees of the Lord! Nityananda! Gauranga! Hare Krishna!


Beggar at the lotus feet of the devotees,
Srinath

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